I think I love you
by Jellybeanhunter.xx
Summary: Josh and Lauren realise how much they like each other, but Lauren's having a very traumatic couple of weeks, will Josh still like her after he finds out what shes doing...?  Changes point of view from Lauren to Josh in different chapters
1. Ouch

Lauren was awoken by the continuous beeping of her alarm clock. She lifted her head and looked at the time. 7 o'clock, it was time to get up. She reached out and switched the alarm off, then sat on the side of her bed. Time to get ready for school. She didn't mind school, not only because she got to see Sam, he best friend in the world, but also because Josh was going to be there. Lauren has been completely in love with Josh since the first time she'd seen him. It was like... love at first sight.

She pulled her pyjama top over her head and pulled on her shirt. When she was buttoning it up her phone beeped. She walked over to her phone and looked at the screen. It was a text from Josh. 'Morning babe xx' she read. The text made her smile. When she got texts from him, they always made her smile.

After replying to Josh's text, she went back to getting ready. She was just finishing putting on her make-up when somebody knocked on her bedroom door.

"Come in," she said, concentrating on her eyeliner to much too even notice her mum's presence in the room.

"Lauren?" her mum asked, waiting for her attention.

"Yeah," she replied, putting her eyeliner back into her make-up bag, and turning to face her mum. Her mum looked upset; she could tell that something bad had happened.

"I have some bad news," she said, walking over to Lauren's unmade bed, and sitting down. She took a deep breath and sighed.

"Mum, what's happened?" Lauren asked, sitting next to her.

"It's your grandfather, he got taken into hospital last night," her mum paused. Lauren was worried; why was her grandfather in hospital? He'd been perfectly fine when she'd visited him yesterday. "He had a heart attack Lauren, the hospital rang last night, but, I didn't want to wake you up."

"What?" Lauren asked. A heart attack? Yeah her grandfather wasn't the healthiest of people, but... people died from heart attacks... didn't they?

"You don't have to go to school today if you don't want to," her mum told her. "You can take a day off if you want."

"No," Lauren replied, holding back her tears. "I want to go to school."

"Maybe seeing your friends will be good for you..." Her mum replied.

"Yeah, maybe," Lauren replied, but she didn't seem too convinced. The only person that she really wanted to see was Josh. He always seemed to cheer her up.

"Well you're late for school now, so I'll drop you in on my way to work, come on," said Lauren's mum, standing up, taking a deep breath and walking out of the door. Lauren grabbed her bag and reluctantly followed. She could tell that this was going to be one of the worst days in school ever. She just hoped that Josh and Sam would be able to cheer her up.

Both Lauren and her mum were silent in the car. Neither knew what to say to the other. "Lauren, you can talk about it you know," her mum told her, breaking the silence. "Talking does help."

"I don't want to talk about it," said Lauren. She looked out of the window, and hoped that her mum wouldn't try talking to her again. She wasn't in the mood for her mum to try and make everything better. Normally her mum could fix anything, but not this time. This time it could never, ever be fixed, and there was nothing that she, or anybody else, could do about it.

She got out of the car as soon as her mum pulled up at the school. She wanted to avoid talking to her mum, because seeing her mum upset, was only making her more upset. She walked towards the school building, and opened the big, heavy doors, and wandered into the empty corridors. Everybody would be in registration now.

As she was wandering towards her locker, she bumped into Mrs Fisher. "Lauren, why aren't you in your registration class?" she asked.

"Sorry miss," replied Lauren. "I've only just got into school."

"And why are you so later this morning?" asked Mrs Fisher.

"Sorry miss, my grandpa went into hospital last night, and my mum only told me this morning," replied Lauren.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear about that. Remember that my office door is open if you need a chat," Mrs Fisher told Lauren.

"Okay, thanks miss," said Lauren, as she walked off towards her registration room. The only noise she could hear was the sound of her feet going 'tap' on the floor tiles. She arrived outside her registration room, and took a deep breath before walking in.

"Lauren, where have you been?" asked Grantly, Laurens registration teacher. He was in a bad mood today, as he often was.

"Sorry Mr Budgen, I came in late," said Lauren, walking towards the table that Sam was sitting on.

"Well, make sure that you get to school on time in future, or I will be contacting Mrs Fisher," said Grantly.

"Okay sir," Lauren replied, taking her seat.

"Lauren, you never oversleep?" Sam asked, puzzled.

"I know, I was ready on time, it's just, my mum came into my room this morning..." Lauren started.

"What does that have to do with you being late?" asked Sam.

"Well... She told me that my grandpa had a heart attack last night, and he's in hospital," sighed Lauren, looking down, and trying her best not to cry.

"Aw Lauren, he'll be fine," said Sam, putting her arm around Lauren's shoulder.

Not long later, the bell rang for first lesson. Lauren took a deep breath, and stood up. She grabbed her bag, and walked out of the room, with Sam by her side. Finn and Josh caught up with them in the corridor.

"Where you both off to next?" asked Finn, smiling at both Lauren and Sam.

"French," sighed Sam.

"History," mumbled Lauren.

"Hey, Josh has history too, you two should walk together, come on Sam, lets leave them alone for a bit," said Finn, dragging Sam towards the French rooms.

"Are you alright?" Josh asked Lauren. "You looked really upset in registration."

"My grandpa went into hospital last night," Lauren said. She felt a tear escape down her cheek. No! She didn't want to start crying. Not in front of Josh.

"Aw Lauren," said Josh, hugging her. She started crying harder, so he pulled her close. "Don't worry, he'll be fine."

"But what if he's not, I haven't even seen him yet," said Lauren.

"I'll go to the hospital with you too see him after school if you want," said Josh.

"But, I'm scared of hospitals," sniffed Lauren.

"Don't worry," said Josh. "I'll be with you, so nothing bad will happen, I promise."

"Thanks Josh," Lauren smiled.

"Welcome," said Josh, smiling back. "Come on, we should get to history."

Lauren and Josh walked to history together. Lauren was surprised how much that Josh had actually cheered her up. It was like being with him had made everything go away. She really, really liked him, but she knew that he wouldn't like her, I mean, she wasn't anything special.


	2. I need you

"And that's what happens when you mix hydrochloric acid with Magnesium." Mr Mead explained, just as the bell rang for lunch. The whole class stood up, some shoving their books into their bags and others standing around talking to one another.

"Finn and Josh can you stay behind please?" asked Mr Mead.

Lauren looked at Josh. "I'll meet you on the yard in ten minutes," he said, smiling at her.

"Okay," she said, smiling back. Then turned to Sam, and they walked off arm in arm.

"Josh and Finn," said Mr Mead.

"Yes Sir?" asked Finn. "Anything in particular that you wanted?"

"Well, for you to stop being so disruptive in my class would be a nice place to start," said Mr Mead. "Josh you're constantly messing around with Lauren, it needs to stop. And Finn, you talk over me all the time. How do you expect to learn if you don't pay attention? Either of you?"

"Sorry Sir," said Josh. All he could really think about was Lauren, and how much he wanted to be with her now, to make sure that she was okay. He wasn't really paying much attention at all to what Mr Mead was saying.

"Yeah, sorry Sir," said Finn. "It won't happen again."

"It had better not," said Mr Mead. "You can go for lunch now boys."

Josh and Finn walked out of the classroom. "See, even Mead noticed you flirting with Lauren, don't even try to deny it Josh," said Finn.

"Fine. I like Lauren," said Josh, looking down at his feet. "But it's kind of obvious that I'd have no chance with her. So what's the point?"

"I have no idea what you're on about," said Finn. "Lauren likes you too; I can't believe that you don't see that."

Josh pushed open the door, and he and Finn stepped outside, and saw the two girls sitting over on a fence in the corner, and so started walking towards them. "Are you coming down the village with me and Sam?" asked Finn.

"Nah," said Josh, looking down at his feet. He couldn't believe that his secret was out, how did Finn guess? He hadn't made it that obvious... had he? He decided that he was going to have to try harder to hide it from Lauren. He didn't want her knowing.

"Come on," said Finn. "I bet Lauren will be coming."

"Fine," said Josh, sighing. Finn was just going to tease him about it now, and he had no way out of it.

Just as they reached where the two girls were standing, Lauren ran off in the opposite direction, looking really upset. Josh wondered if she was crying.

"What's up with Lauren?" Josh asked Sam.

"She's really upset about her grandpa I think," replied Sam. "This isn't normal for her."

"What's wrong with her grandpa?" asked Finn.

"He's just gone into hospital," explained Sam. "He had a heart attack last night."

"Oh," replied Finn. He grabbed his phone from his pocket with a sneaky grin on his face and started texting.

"I'm going to see if Lauren's okay," said Josh, running off and not taking any notice of what Finn was texting...

Josh ran over to the building that Lauren had disappeared into. He looked around... It was silent. He heard the 'THUD' of the door as it closed behind him and the light 'tap' of his feet on the floor, but nothing else.

He looked inside every classroom, looking for Lauren. He didn't have any idea where she might be, or where to find her.

'Maybe if I text her she'll tell me where she is? Nah doubt it," he thought to himself. He wanted to make sure that she was okay. She had looked quite upset when she ran off.

Finally he came across an art room that he heard faint noises in. He opened the door and surely enough Lauren was sat at the table with her artwork in front of her, crying quietly to herself as she painted. She looked up when she heard him come in.

"Lauren, are you okay?" asked Josh, sitting in the seat beside her.

"Yeah..." lied Lauren.

"You sure?" asked Josh. "You don't look okay; remember I'm always here if you want to talk about anything."

"Well, I'm not fine, I'm just worrying about everything," admitted Lauren. "What if my grandpa dies? Heart attacks can kill." She sighed and looked back down at her painting. A teardrop fell down from her face, and landed on the painting.

"Lauren," sighed Josh. He didn't know what to say, but he was really worried about her. He wanted her to be happy again. He put his arm around her and she rested her head on his chest and started crying. "Lauren," Josh repeated, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah," mumbled Lauren, between sobs.

"I..." he sighed. "Do you want to go somewhere else? To take your mind off things?" he asked. He wanted to tell her that he loved her. But he didn't know how to say it, and he didn't know what her reaction would be. He didn't want to tell her if she didn't love him back...

"Okay," said Lauren, looking up at him. He wiped a tear from her face and half-smiled.

"Cheer up," he told her. "It's not the end of the world, I'm sure that he'll be fine."

"Thanks Josh," Lauren said, smiling at him. Josh stood up and grabbed her hand. She looked up and smiled at him. He was trying to figure out if she liked him as a friend, or possibly any more...

Josh led her out of the art room and onto the yard. They walked over to the fence where Finn and Sam had been standing. But they had obviously gone down to the village now.

The bell suddenly rang for afternoon school, and everyone started to walk inside. Josh caught Lauren's hand as she was about to walk inside. "Cheer up," he mouthed at her, before letting her walk off.


	3. It hurts

Lauren walked right past her English class. She was supposed to have English now, but she felt like she wanted to be alone. She was sure that Mr Clarkson wouldn't mind if she was five minutes late. She walked over to the girls toilets and looked at herself in the mirror. 'Thank god I came into the toilets,' she thought. 'I look a mess.' Her make-up had all run from where she'd been crying. She searched through her bag and pulled out a small pink make-up bag.

She searched through the little bag, and found her mascara. She slowly started to sort her make-up out. She was horrified that Josh had seen her in that state! How could she have let herself look like that in front of him!

She heard her phone go off in her bag as she was putting her make-up away. She searched through her bag and found her phone, she looked at the screen and a message came up. It was from Sam. 'Where r u? x' she read. She quickly typed her reply, 'in the loos, b in lesson in 5 x' and put her phone back into her bag. She knew that she'd have to go to lesson now. She was about 15 minutes late.

Lauren walked out of the toilets and down the hall, back to her English class, which she had walked past a few minutes before. She paused for a second outside the door, took a deep breath and turned the handle.

When she walked in everybody turned to look at her. Josh was sat in the corner of the room next to Finn, and looked really worried about her. Sam was sat on the table in front of them, and gave her a half smile. Everybody seemed to be looking at her and talking. Were they talking about her...?

"Lauren, why are you so late?" asked Mr Clarkson. He looked at his watch. "This lesson started 20 minutes ago."

"Sorry Sir," said Lauren, looking at the floor.

"Where have you been Lauren," asked Mr Clarkson, getting slightly annoyed.

"I was in the toilets Sir," replied Lauren. She bit her lip; everyone was still talking and looking at her. She didn't like it.

"Right, I want to see you after class," said Mr Clarkson. "Now take your seat."

Lauren walked over to where Sam was sat, and sat in the empty seat next to her, placing her bag on the floor under the table.

"Everybody be quiet and get back to your work," Mr Clarkson said, going back to the marking that he had been doing before Lauren had entered the room. Him saying that stopped everybody talking, but they still all kept looking at her.

"Why is everybody looking at me like that?" Lauren whispered to Sam.

"Someone spread the word that your grandpa's in hospital," sighed Sam.

"Oh," Lauren sighed. "I guess that's not too bad…"

"They don't know that he's had a heart attack though," explained Sam. "They think that your mum put him in."

"What," said Lauren, slightly confused. "Why do they think that?"

"I don't know," said Sam. "That's just what some people have been saying, sorry."

Lauren looked down at the table. She was really confused. Who told everyone that her grandpa was in hospital? And why did they tell everyone that it was her mum's fault that he was in? Her mum would never do anything to hurt her grandpa. She knew that she wouldn't.

The lesson dragged on for ages. Lauren was getting sick of all the comments. She hated people getting involved in her business. She didn't know who spread it, but when she found out who it was, she wasn't going to let them off lightly.

When the bell finally rang for the end of afternoon lessons, Lauren grabbed her bag and stormed out of the classroom before Mr Clarkson had dismissed them. She wanted to get out of there. She hated people judging her, and judging her family. And it was the worst possible time as well. She had enough going on, without someone spreading rumours.

"Lauren! Lauren!" She heard someone calling her name behind her as she was walking out of the school gates. She looked behind and saw Josh running after her.

"Josh," she said, smiling. She was always happy to see him, no matter how much of a bad mood she was in. He stopped running as he got closer to her, and hugged her.

"You alright?" he asked her. "I heard some of the stuff that people were saying, and it wasn't too nice."

"I'm fine… I guess," she replied, sighing. "Do you know who spread that stuff?"

"No, sorry," Josh said. "We still going to the hospital, or do you not want to anymore?"

"Yeah," she smiled. "I want to go, as long as you're coming too."

"Of course I'm coming," Laughed Josh. "I'm not going to let you go on your own."

Lauren smiled at Josh, and he smiled back. She loved spending time with him. He always seemed to make all the bad things go away. Well that was, until he was gone again… He grabbed her hand and they started walking towards the hospital. She was glad that she didn't have to go on her own. It seemed a lot easier going with Josh.

"Are you looking forward to seeing you grandpa?" asked Josh.

"Yes and no," sighed Lauren. "I don't want to see him because I hate to see him when he's upset or hurt, but, I want to see him, just to see if he's alright."

"Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be fine," said Josh, squeezing her hand. She smiled at him again.

They arrived at the hospital and stepped through the double doors into the reception area. It smelled of… hospitals. That's the only word that Lauren could think of that described the smell. She hated hospitals, she always had. Josh could tell that she was getting scared and squeezed her hand again.

They walked over to the reception desk and asked directions to where the heart care ward was. After they had been pointed in the right direction, they walked over to where the elevators were.

"We can either take the elevator or walk up 7 flights of stairs?" asked Josh.

"Elevator," said Lauren, pressing the 'up' button to call the elevator. Josh looked at her and sighed. "What?" she asked.

"I hate to see you upset," he admitted.

"Sorry," sighed Lauren.

"No," said Josh. "You shouldn't have to apologise for being upset, it's not your fault." Lauren smiled at him. The elevator arrived and they both walked in and Lauren pressed the button that would take them to floor 7.

When the elevator reached floor 7, they got out and walked over to another reception desk. "Hello," asked the lady behind the desk. "Is there someone that you're looking for?"

"Gareth Andrews," said Lauren, looking at the floor.

"Oh," said the receptionist. "Is your mum with you?"

"No," replied Lauren.

"Are you immediate family?" asked the receptionist.

"He's my grandpa," replied Lauren.

"And what about you?" she looked at Josh.

"I'm just here with her, she didn't want to be on her own," replied Josh.

"Okay, well I can let you both go in, but only this once. It should be immediate family only, but I don't want you to go in on your own," said the receptionist, looking at Lauren. "It's down there," she said pointing down to one of the wards. "Go through those doors, turn left and through the other double doors, you should find him in the bed closest to the window."

"Thanks," Lauren said. She and Josh walked the direction that the receptionist pointed them in. When they reached the doors Josh held it open for Lauren, she looked at him and tried to force a smile.

When they'd reached the second set of double doors, Lauren paused outside. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to," Josh told her. "We can just go somewhere else, away from the hospital."

"No." said Lauren. "I want to see him, just to see if he's okay."

"Okay," said Josh. He grabbed her hand and they walked through together. When they reached her grandpa's bed, Lauren pulled back the curtain and saw him lying there, surrounded by machines. Josh squeezed her hand.

Lauren let go of Josh's hand and slowly walked over to the side of her grandpa's bed, and took his hand in hers. A tear ran down her cheek. He was hooked up to loads of different machines, and looked lifeless. She sat on the bed and started crying, with her face in her hands.

"Lauren," said Josh, moving her hands from her face. She looked up at him, and wondered when he'd got there. He was over in the corner the last time she looked. He grabbed her arm and pulled her up, then hugged her tight. "We can go if you want?"

Lauren nodded her head, and wipes her eyes with her sleeve. "I can't do this," she mumbled.

"We can come back when you're ready," he told her. "But look, he's not dead is he?"

Lauren edged towards the curtain again. "Can we go now please?" she asked.

"Yeah," said Josh, walking over to her, and taking her hand. They walked out of the ward together in silence.


	4. Mums home?

**I did upload a chapter 4 last night, but I didn't like the way it went when I went to write a chapter 5, so i re-wrote it. Chapters may be a little less often now, since I'm ungrounded and I have a lot of coursework to catch up on. But I should upload at least one every 2-3 days :3 Becki x**

* * *

Josh followed Lauren up her stone path, through her front garden too her front door, then waited as she opened the door to let herself in. "Are you going to be okay?" he asked her, not wanting to leave her on her own.

"Yeah, I'm fine," replied Lauren. "But Josh…"

"Yeah," said Josh.

"Can you stay for a bit?" asked Lauren. "Nobody's home and I don't want to be on my own."

"Of course I will," said Josh. He knew that his dad would probably go mental when he got home, but he didn't want to leave Lauren on her own.

"Thanks," Lauren said, smiling. They both stepped inside and Lauren closed the front door behind them, and then led Josh into the lounge. She sat straight on the sofa, and turned the TV on. Josh sat next to her and put his arm around her.

Just as they sat down, Josh's mobile went off. He looked at it and saw that he had a text from his dad. He read it 'Josh come home please.'

"Lauren, I have to go," he sighed. "My dad wants me home."

"Oh," sighed Lauren.

"Are you going to be alright here on you own?" asked Josh. He really didn't want to leave her on her own, but he didn't really have much choice.

"Yeah…" said Lauren, trailing off.

"I'll ring you when I get home okay?" said Josh. He felt really bad for having to leave her on her own.

"Okay," Lauren said, with a weak smile. "I'll talk to you later then."

"Bye," said Josh. He stood up and waited. But Lauren didn't move. He sighed and walked out of the room. He guessed that she was in a mood with him, so he wouldn't get a hug goodbye. But it wasn't really his fault. If he could stay then he would.

He stepped outside and closed the door behind him and started walking down the street to his house. He wondered if his dad was going to be in a bad mood. He'd told him this morning that he would come straight home from school… But things had come up.

When he was half way down his street he noticed that his mum's car was parked outside his dad's house. He was confused; his mum never went down his dads. He hurried over to his house, wondering what was going on.

He opened his front door and walked in. It seemed empty as he dropped his bag to the floor and wondered into the kitchen. He found his mum and dad sat at the table in the kitchen, waiting for him.

"Josh, sit down," said his dad. Josh walked over to a chair and sat down.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Josh, your mum wants full custody of you again, she's willing to take it to court," explained his dad.

"Well she can take it to court, I'm not leaving," said Josh. "I like it here."

"Josh, you're my little boy, I haven't seen you properly in ages," explained his mum. "I want you to come home, where you belong."

"I am home," said Josh. "I belong here. Nobody can make me go back with you."

"The court could," sighed Josh's dad.

"How?" asked Josh. "You're my dad; I should be allowed to stay with you if I want to."

"Yes, but I didn't have any contact with you until this year," explained Josh's dad. "They could very well say that I haven't known you long enough to have full custody of you."

"But mum didn't tell you about me," said Josh. "That shouldn't count, and your my English teacher, it's not like you're going to do anything to hurt me."

"Yes, but the court may not see it that way Josh," explained Josh's dad.

"If they make me go and live with her, then I'm going to run away," said Josh.

"Josh," said Josh's mum. "Don't do this to me, I want you back."

"Mum, you lied to me my whole life, I want nothing to do with you," said Josh. He stood up and walked out of the kitchen, but stopped at the door before he walked out. "Don't take this to court mum, I've got enough on my mind without a court case. Just live with it"

He walked upstairs and into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. Why did his mum have to turn up? Today out of all days? He didn't want anything to do with her, but he could tell that she wasn't just going to let go. He didn't think he'd been lying on his bed for long before he heard the doorbell ring. He looked at his clock. It was 1am. Who could be here at this time?

He walked downstairs, half asleep and opened the door. Lauren and Sam were standing there. Then he remembered, he'd forgotten to ring Lauren when he got home!

"Josh, why did you tell Lauren that you'd ring her, and then not bother?" asked Sam.

"I was going to, but I had a lot happening," explained Josh. He was half asleep, he didn't want an argument. Not now, after everything that had happened today.

"What falling asleep?" asked Lauren.

"No," said Josh. "My mum was round."

"Wow, my dad comes round sometimes," said Lauren. "But that doesn't stop me ringing people that I told that I'd ring?" Josh noticed that Sam stayed quiet. Maybe she knew what it felt like, because he could tell that Lauren didn't.

"Lauren," said Josh. "Look I'm sorry, I honestly was going to ring you, but I got caught up in things."

"Like what?" asked Lauren. "You mum took you out somewhere did she? So you didn't even have the decency to text me?"

"Lauren, my mums trying to take custody of me, that means me moving away forever," said Josh. "And she's threatening to take it to court, so the last thing I need at the moment is this. You're not the only one with problems you know." Josh closed the door before Lauren or Sam could say anything and walked back upstairs to go to bed.

He felt quite bad for having a go at Lauren, especially since her grandpa was in hospital and everything, but she needed to know that she wasn't the only one with problems… He lay on his bed thinking about everything, wondering if maybe he'd been too harsh on her. She didn't know did she?


	5. I thought you liked me

**Sorry I haven't uploaded a story in a few days I've been busy with school work. I should be revising for my biology test now, but I got bored and decided to write another chapter (: By the way I do know that Finn would never do what he does in this chapter, but him doing it just fitted into the storyline. Review please (: 3  
**

* * *

Lauren was woken up by her alarm clock and its constant beeping. She looked at the time, 6:40am, time to get up. The first thing that she saw when she sat on her bed was that her phone was flashing. She looked at it and saw that she had a text. She read, 'sorry for Friday night, I over reacted x'. It was from Josh. She didn't really want to talk to him, but she knew that she would when she was in school, so replied saying 'dw babe, it don't matter x'.

She knew she had plenty of time to get ready, so she wasn't in a rush. She'd spent all weekend with Sam and Finn. She'd left them alone at 8 the night before, and wondered what had happened when she'd gone. She couldn't wait to find Sam and see what had happened.

She slowly pulled on her clothes. She could hear one of her brothers was already up, playing music quite loudly. She was surprised that his music hadn't woken her or anybody else up any sooner. She guessed that her family must all be heavy sleepers.

When she'd got dressed and done her hair and make-up it was quarter to 8. She made her way downstairs to the kitchen where her mum and brothers were already sat eating breakfast.

"Morning," said her mum. "What do you want for breakfast?"

"Toast," said Lauren, sitting down on one of the spare seats at the table.

"You can't," said Lewis, one of her brothers. "I had the last of the bread."

"Well what can I have then?" asked Lauren.

"Cereal?" offered her mum.

"Can't I used all the milk," said her other brother, Tom.

"I'm guessing that everything's been eaten and I can't have breakfast then…" assumed Lauren, sighing. She should have got her breakfast as soon as she got up, it would have been a lot easier.

"You can have pancakes?" asked her mum. "There's two spare in the fridge."

"Why didn't you tell us that there were pancakes?" asked Lewis.

"Yeah, that's not fair," said Tom.

"You lot were already eating when I came down," replied Lauren's mum. "You didn't need pancakes as well."

"I'm not really that hungry," said Lauren. "I'll just take a muffin and eat it on the way to school." Lauren opened one of the kitchen cupboard and grabbed a chocolate muffin from the shelf.

"You can't have a muffin for breakfast Lauren," said her mum, sighing.

"Why not?" asked Lauren. She looked at the time on the clock. "Mum I don't have any choice, I have to go."

"Fine, go," sighed her mum.

Lauren grabbed her bag where she had dumped it in the hall, grabbed her house key from the tiny wooden table next to the front door and opened the door. A big cold gust of wind blew in, pushing her hair back. She grabbed her coat from the hook on the wall and walked outside, closing the door behind her. Before she started walking to where she was meeting Sam, she pulled on her coat. She didn't like it that much, but she decided that it was better than being cold.

She took her time walking down the street, nibbling at her chocolate muffin. By the time she reached where Sam was waiting for her, she was about 10 minutes late.

"Where have you been?" Sam asked her.

"Oh, sorry," said Lauren. "I left early, so I thought I'd have time to walk slowly."

"Well we've got enough time to get to school, but I've been standing in the cold waiting for you for ten minutes," sighed Sam.

"Sorry," said Lauren. "So what happened with you and Finn yesterday after I left?" Lauren looked at Sam, waiting for answers.

"Umm," Sam sighed. "Well, we were both sat in the park, and he kissed me, but after being with him all day, I realised that I don't really like him that much."

"So what happened?" asked Lauren.

"He asked what was wrong and I told him I don't think that I like him in that way, so he pushed me away and had a go at me for leading him on and walked off. And when he was gone, I realised I do really like him, and I wished I hadn't said anything," sighed Sam.

"Aww Sam!" said Lauren. "I'm sure he would have calmed down by now, just find him today and apologise to him and tell him that you made a mistake."

"Yeah, I guess that's the best idea," said Sam. "Thanks Lauren."

"What are best friends for?" said Lauren, smiling at Sam.

* * *

When they reached school the bell was just ringing, so they ran over to their registration room. Finn and Josh weren't in their registration class, but they had art with them next, so all Lauren could think about was seeing Josh.

"Do you think Finn's going to be in a mood with me?" asked Sam.

"I doubt it," replied Lauren. "He might be a bit upset, but he really likes you, so I doubt that he'll be that mad at you."

"Right, everyone quiet," said Grantly, as he walked in and put a huge stack of paper onto his desk. The noise level didn't change. "QUIET!" he shouted. Everybody looked up to see Grantly red in the face with anger.

"What's wrong sir?" asked Amy.

"Never you mind what's wrong," said Grantly. "Now that you're all quiet, I've heard from staff around the school that they've had some appalling behaviour from a few of you, especially you Amy, and I'm sick of it. You will behave around school, do you hear me?"

"Yes Mr Budgen," chorused the class.

"Good, now get on with whatever you want until the bell rings," he said, sitting in his chair, and picking up a newspaper.

When the bell rang Lauren and Sam walked arm in arm to art. When they got there Finn and Josh were already sitting down. Josh smiled at Lauren as she walked in and Lauren smiled back at him. She was glad that they were talking again. But she noticed that Finn didn't even look at Sam, he turned around and whispered something to someone sat on the table opposite to him.

Lauren and Sam walked over to the table where Finn and Josh were sat and sat down in their usual seats opposite them.

"What do you think you're doing?" Finn asked Sam.

"Sitting down?" said Sam.

"Not on this table you're not, go and lead someone else on, because I'm not interested," said Finn.

"Finn," sighed Sam. "Can we just talk about it?"

"What's there to talk about?" asked Finn. "You lead me on, simple."

"I didn't lead you on though," sighed Sam.

"So what exactly did you do then?" asked Finn. By this time the whole class was listening to their argument, and waiting for Sam to reply.

"Look," said Sam. "I didn't lead you on; I said I wasn't sure if I liked you in that way or not."

"Yet you were giving me the impression that you definitely did like me?" said Finn.

"I do like you," said Sam, sighing.

"Of course you do, I'm not falling for that again," said Finn. "Go away and leave me alone."

"Come on Sam, let's go and sit on the table over there," said Lauren, gesturing to a table on the other side of the room.

Lauren and Sam walked over to the other side of the room and sat down on the empty table. Lauren would have given anything to sit in her normal seat, with Josh. But she wasn't going to leave her best friend on her own all lesson.

When the bell rang for break, Lauren and Sam took their time putting their things away. They were in no rush to go and wait outside in the cold for 20 minutes. Josh and Finn were still on the other side of the room 5 minutes after the bell had gone. They walked over to where Lauren and Sam were sat talking at the table.

"Hey," said Josh, smiling at Lauren.

"Hey," said Lauren, smiling back. She tried to think of what to say. She never knew what to say to him. But she wanted to talk to him. Why did live have to be so difficult. But before her and Josh had a chance to say anything else to each other they heard a crashing beside them. They turned around to see Sam on the floor, clutching her face and Finn kicking her.

"FINN WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" screamed Lauren, trying to pull Finn off Sam. As she tried Finn pushed Lauren back, and she banged her head on the table.

"Finn, stop it!" said Josh. "You can't beat up a girl!"

Lauren was just sat on the floor, helplessly watching her best mate getting hurt by the only person she'd ever really liked. She wished that she could do something.


	6. Please be okay

**Sorry this is quite a short chapter, and it's a bit jumbled up, I've just been having a bit of writters block. I know what I want to happen, I just can't get it to sound right when i write it out. I wrote this quite quickly because I saw that I hadn't written in a while, but I will be writting a better chapter that should be uploaded by about Wednesday of next week at the latest, if not sooner. Please review and tell me how bad you think it is, because I think it's probably the worst chapter so far **

* * *

There was someone coming into the art rooms. "Come on Josh," he said, hurrying out of the door. Josh didn't know what to do, he looked at Lauren, she was sat against a table, crying. Then he looked down at Sam who wasn't even conscious.

"No Finn," said Josh. "This is your problem not mine, I'm not running." Josh walked over to Lauren and helped her up as Finn ran out of the classroom and around the corner. Before the door even had chance to close Miss Campbell came in and saw the three of them.

As soon as she saw Sam she rushed over to her. "Josh, Lauren, what happened?" she asked. Josh looked at Lauren. He didn't want to tell on Finn, but he wasn't going to stop her.

"I don't know miss," said Lauren, hugging Josh, and hiding her face in his chest. Josh hugged Lauren tightly, but didn't know what to say to Miss Campbell as she turned to look at him.

"I don't know either miss, we walked in and she was on the floor like that," he told her.

"But I left you three and Finn in here together less than 10 minutes ago," said Miss Campbell. "How can you not know what happened?"

"Me and Lauren were out in the hallway miss," said Josh. He'd decided that he wouldn't say that Finn did it, but he wouldn't say that he didn't either. And he hoped that when Sam woke up, she wouldn't remember who'd hurt her.

"Right, well Josh can you go and get Mrs Fisher to phone an ambulance for me please?" asked Mrs Campbell.

* * *

Josh hurried down the hallway to Mrs Fisher's office. He hoped that Sam would be alright. He didn't see how Finn could to that to anyone, let alone a girl. It just wasn't right. He didn't want his friend to get into trouble, but he didn't think that he should be able to get away with it either.

When he reached Mrs Fisher's office he hurried in, thinking that it was much too important to bother with knocking on the door.

"Josh, do you not know the meaning of knocking?" said Mrs Fisher, looking up from her work.

"Yes miss, but its Sam, she's unconscious in the art rooms, Miss Campbell said can you ring an ambulance," said Josh. He said it in such a rush that Mrs Fisher didn't understand a word of it.

"What?" she asked.

"Phone an ambulance then come to the art room," said Josh. Then he ran back to the art room where he had left Sam, Lauren and Mrs Campbell. He didn't want to leave Lauren on her own because he knew what she'd been going through the past few weeks, and he felt he hadn't been there for her enough.

* * *

Josh and Lauren were sat in the waiting room of the hospital, waiting for news on Sam. She'd been in the operating theatre for an hour now. Josh could tell that Lauren was worried, but he didn't know what he could say that would make anything better.

He saw a tear run down her cheek and wiped it away. She looked at him and he smiled at her. "Remember I'm always here for you," he reminded her.

"Thanks Josh," said Lauren, sighing. Josh put his arm around her and pulled her closer to him. She looked up and smiled at him, then rested her head on his shoulder.

Josh stared at the wall and started thinking about his mum, and everything that was happening at home. He hadn't thought about it a hell of a lot because there were so many other things going on that mattered to him more. Did he want to go and live with his mum? Leave his dad, friends and Waterloo Road behind? Leave Lauren behind?

His thought got interrupted when a nurse came over to where Josh and Lauren were sitting. "You can go through to see Sambuca now," she told them, smiling.

* * *

Lauren and Josh followed the nurse into the ward, hand in hand. Josh gently squeezed Laurens hand and they walked further towards Sam's bed. When they reached her bed, they were shocked at how pale and bruised that she was.

"Do you know where her mother or father is?" asked the nurse.

"Her dad's in jail and her mum's at work," said Lauren. "But I'm her best friend, practically family."

"Well, did you know that she was 2 weeks pregnant?" asked the nurse.

Lauren looked shocked; Josh guessed that Sam hadn't told her. "What?" asked Lauren. "I don't think that's possible.

"Well it's true," said the nurse. "Do you have any idea who the father of the child is?"

"I think I do," said Lauren. "Is the baby okay?"

"No, I'm afraid she had a miscarriage," said the nurse. "Was it the father of the baby who did this to her.

Lauren nodded. "I think so."

The nurse nodded her head and then walked off, leaving Lauren and Josh on their own by Sam's bed.

"So, do you think its Finn's?" Josh asked Lauren.

"Yeah, she's not long enough gone for it to be Bolton's," replied Lauren.

"So, Finn would have known that she was pregnant then, and hurt her really badly anyway?" asked Josh.

"Yeah, Finn's a dick, but I still don't understand why she didn't tell me," sighed Lauren. "I'm like her best friend. We never keep things from each other."

"Maybe she was going to tell you later on," said Josh, he put his arm around Lauren and pulled her towards him. She rested her head against him and wrapped her arms around him. He looked down at her and she smiled at him. Josh smiled back at her and then kissed her softly on the lips.

Lauren looked up at Josh and smiled at him, then rested her head on his shoulder again, cuddling up to him. Josh was glad at how well that went, he'd been worrying about it for a while, but he found out that he'd had nothing to worry about, nothing bad happened.


	7. Cut

Lauren was pacing her room, worrying about Sam. Josh had just left her, he'd offered to stay, just until her parents got back, but she just wanted to be on her own. She did want him to stay, and now, thinking about it, she wished she'd let him stay.

She had a lot going on at the moment, with her grandpa and her best friend both in hospital and it was probably her fault that they were both there. She wasn't sure what else could go wrong in her life. She missed the days where everything was perfect and easy, when she didn't have a care in the world – she just wanted to be happy again.

Why hadn't Sam told her that she was pregnant – did she hate her now or something? Had she done something wrong like spending too much time with Josh or something? Maybe she should stop seeing Josh so much…? But then that would upset Josh… There wasn't a way that she could make everything okay again no matter how hard she tried.

She walked over to the mirror and looked at herself. 'What am I DOING with my life?' she thought to herself. She looked a mess. Her hair was up in a ponytail, and it showed her ears, that were much too small for her face, and her legs were huge. How could she have let herself go like that?

She sat on her bed and stared out of the window aimlessly. She wanted there to be a way to fix everything, just to make everything go away – truthfully she knew that she wanted to die, but she was trying to hide it from herself for as long as possible because, even though the thought of dying made her happy, because all of her problems would go away, she was also scared of it. Scared that something might go wrong and that she would be stuck in hospital or something, and she didn't want that.

She walked into the bathroom and closed the door, locking it behind her. She looked on the glass bathroom shelves at all the bottles of shampoo and conditioner and a few bottles of bleach. She kept looking along the shelves, but couldn't find what she was looking for. She looked at the back of the shelves, behind the bottles of shampoo and found it – her razor.

She picked it up and turned the tap on then rolled up her sleeve, examining her wrist. It was slightly pale and she could see the veins. She'd never done this before, so she didn't exactly know how, but she knew that it would make her feel better, she deserved to be hurt, she'd put two people in hospital. She put the razor to her wrist and slowly pulled it across.

Blood seeped out from under the razor, when she pulled the razor away; her wrist was flowing with blood. Tears started running down her face, but she deserved this, she'd feel better after she punished herself, she was sure of it. She put the razor in the sink and turned off the tap and sunk to the floor clutching her wrist and crying quietly.

After she'd been crying for about 15 minutes she removed her hand from over her wrist to examine the damage. She couldn't see anything through the blood. This started to worry her – how much blood had she lost? Had she cut the vein? Was she going to die? She stood up and washed her wrist in the sink. The water in the sink turned deep red from all of the blood.

When she had washed all of the blood off, she looked at her wrist and saw a large cut, going from one side to the other. It didn't look that deep; she thought she'd be fine. She sat on the toilet seat and sighed – for a few minutes she actually liked the fact that she could have died.

She looked over to the sink, the whole of the sink and a big part of the floor was covered in blood. 'How could one cut make that much blood?' she wondered to herself. She could hear the key turning in the door downstairs – her mum was home, she was going to have to clean up all of this blood.

She grabbed the hand towel that was next to the sink, wet it and set to work. Her wrist was killing her, but she didn't want her mum to find out. If she did, then she knew that she would be in trouble, and her mum had enough on her plate, without having a psychopath for a daughter.

Just as she was finished washing up the blood she could faintly hear someone calling her name. She opened the bathroom door and she was right, her mum was calling her from downstairs.

"What?" she shouted back, she stayed in the doorway of the bathroom, waiting for a reply, and hiding the hand holding the bloody hand towel behind her back.

"Food will be ready in 10 minutes!" she heard her mum reply.

"Okay!" she shouted back, and then made her way into her room. She needed to find somewhere to hide the hand towel until she was home alone and could wash it without her mum finding out. She put it into a plastic shopping back that she found under her bed – probably from one of her many trips into town with Sam – and then shoved it under her bed again, somewhere where her mum would never look even if she was looking for something.

Then she looked down at her wrist. She couldn't go down with a cut wrist and blood all over her shirt. She took her shirt off and pulled the bag back out from under the bed. She put her shirt in it as well, and then shoved it back under her bed. She took her skirt and tights off as well. She may as well change. She opened her wardrobe and pulled out a pair of jeans and a hoodie. They would do – she wasn't exactly going anywhere.

She got changed and made sure that the hoodie covered her wrist before going downstairs and into the kitchen where her mum was dishing up food. "Pie and chips," said her mum. She wondered how her mum even knew she was there. She hadn't said anything and she was sure that she hadn't made much noise.

When her mum had dished up, they were both sat at the table quietly picking at their food. "Lauren…" said her mum.

"Yeah," said Lauren.

"Why is there blood on your hand?" she asked. Lauren looked straight to the hand with the cut wrist wondering how she could have missed some blood. "No the other hand." She looked at her other hand and surely enough, there was blood on it.

"Oh, that must still be there from science," said Lauren, saving herself on the spot. "We were cutting up lambs hearts."

"Oh, okay," said her Mum. "Make sure you wash it off before you go to bed." Lauren was surprised her mum believed that lie, but she knew that it was good. Next time she'd make sure that she washed both hands before coming down to her mum, if there was a next time.


End file.
